This poem was created to talk about my role as a PhD supervisor the DELA conference (18/10/2021). It talks about the internalized fears of not being good enough and how these fears manifest in the academic writing.
Text: Roxana Chiappa
Music: Alex Collet
Listen to these words here
“You never know about the power of your smile!
I was defeated.
I tried to pronounce those words that my grandma used to say when I fell down,
but for some reason, I could not say it in his language.
I was not aware of the old fears and desires installed in the figures of the blond dolls of my childhood.
Neither I knew about the lasting effects of that fear in my mouth…
30 years later, living among people with academic titles
Lost in thoughts, I hit the floor. I did not see the step.
I had to pause and open the black box, and touch the vulnerability in me.
Without wanting it, I found an anonymous smile who invited me to trust
in the imperfect accent of my words and the deep intention of connecting with you.
And then, I started to smile for no reason, especially while I was walking among strangers.
I learned about the mirror effect and the power of my smile…
and thus, I found you reading this piece”